December 2011
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Everything I Did This Morning Before Starting To...
1. Remained in my bed for half an hour after my alarm went off, trying to read various things around my room without my glasses (Number of book titles/pictures/movie titles I could see/read: zero.) and examining my retainers, which surely must be grosser than the retainers of every other retainer-wearer in the entire world.
2. Lied down in front of my parents’ fridge for a few minutes,...
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WatchTHIS IS INCREDIBLE. I will never grow tired of Bad Lip Readings so long as I live.
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Longreads: Edith Zimmerman: My Top 6 Longreads of... →
longreads:
Edith Zimmerman is a writer and co-editor of The Hairpin.
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“All the Single Ladies,” Kate Bolick, The Atlantic
Kate’s story on the current state of marriage, and men, and women, is sad and happy and fascinating, and just generally makes me want to give her a high-five and…
Edith has good taste.
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On The Marriage Plot
I finished The Marriage Plot yesterday, after a whirlwind of reading over Christmas Eve and Christmas Day in which I realized it’s been about a billion years since I’ve read any fiction that wasn’t sci-fi (I got on an Isaac Asimov kick for a while there). I’m in grad school, I only have time for non-fiction. Or Netflix, really. I also remembered how hard it is for me to...
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Did you guys have this too?
K: This might be inappropriate but did you guys have, when you were in middle school, that story that went around about the guy who put his ear up to a hole in the bathroom stall because he hears a noise and then, like, got his ear poked by a penis? Like it was a "glory hole" basically, only we didn't know what that was back then?
J: Yeah I think we had that too. I sort of remember that.
K: So it's just an urban legend probably. I feel like one version of the story was that the guy died somehow? Like ear...impaling?
J: I don't know why he'd just stay there though. Just letting it...poke him. Like, "No, I'm sticking with this. I definitely hear something."
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Home for the holidays
Today is my first day at my parents’ for holiday break and so far I have:
1. Gotten lunch with my mom, and saw a kid from my high school at the restaurant, and thought maybe he’s gotten kind of hot, but that could’ve just been because he was handing me a sandwich.
2. Went nail polish shopping with my mom, because when her and I are together we always have to go to Ulta and buy...
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Me and Rylee Discuss Bars and Boys on The Awl →
So can I always get to go hang out in bars with my friends, hiding a little notebook in my lap and jotting down notes? (Actually the truth is that when the very drunk boys discussed in this article were talking to us, I was openly writing down what they were saying and THEY DID NOT NOTICE EVEN A LITTLE BIT.)
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Longreads: New York Times Writer Jenna Wortham: My... →
longreads:
Jenna Wortham is a technology reporter at The New York Times. In her spare time she makes zines and stalks former America’s Next Top Model contestants in Brooklyn. She can be found on Twitter and Tumblr.
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SO many of my favorites have already been called out—Mindy Kaling’s…
Ahhh thank you thank you thank you to Jenna Wortham for the mention on Longreads! It’s an...
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Terror Babies
Last night I went downstairs to my friends’ apartment only to find my friend Silvana reading facts about marsupial reproduction aloud.
“How did you get to this point?” I asked her.
“Me and Marie were talking about babies, and if it would be grosser to have them in different ways than the human way, and we got to talking about kangaroos,” she said.
“Like, do...
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So my roommate and I have been watching a LOT of...
Like, four seasons in about…a week and a half? It’s finals breakdown, or that thing where you should be concentrating the most effort on your work at the end of the semester but actually all you do is order Chinese food and watch TV and go to the Mall of America on a Wednesday to get Christmas presents for everyone you know, and try on lots of particularly glittery makeup at Sephora.
...
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WatchWAIT HOLD UP what about this one!!!! Robyn EXPLAIN YOUR OUTFIT TO ME, you perfect beautiful tiny weird little doll.
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WatchRobynnnnnnnnnnn on Saturday Night Life!!! Girl you perfect.
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Reading Between The Texts: Tis The Season →
I’ve been really excited about this going up all day, because it’s been a while! Yay. It’s good to be home, in a warm and soothing nest made out of craziness and friendship and swear words.
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My Pan Am Recap - "Nuclear Meltdown" →
I am still SMDH over last night’s episode. Let’s talk about our feelings about Dean.
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Rylee knows less than zero celebrities
R: What movie do we have from Netflix right now?
K: Cyrus.
R: That's the one with Logan James...Rogan! ...Noah...Nolan? Roland. What is it?
K: I want you to keep trying.
R: ................JONAH HILL. See? Roland, Joland. Jonah.
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Literally Everything That's In My Purse →
Did you ever wonder what lives in my purse, like some kind of creep, or a curious normal person? Today on The Hairpin, you can find out.
Or you could climb into my bedroom window right now. I’m on the second floor so it might be kind of difficult, but if you are careful with the blinds, I probably won’t even hear you come in. My purse is on the floor. Please don’t take...
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WatchI know this was on weeks ago but I am BEHIND and I just want to say that I just watched this about seventy-eight times and my new criteria for TV is that I don’t want to watch anything anymore unless Melissa McCarthy is the star of it. Her timing! Her expressions! She is a genius.
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“Let me tell you something. Life is there for the taking. So I’m gonna grab...”
– Donna, Pulling 